Happy Decorative Gourd Season!

Behold! The work of a master carver! 

Get it?!

Doesn't that shiz look so seasonal? Of course it does. I like to think it transitions well into the quickly approaching holiday of excess and gluttony that is Thanksgiving. I love traditions and carving pumpkins is just something you do this time of year. YouknowwhatImsayin'???

October is my very favorite. This year, it did not disappoint. I finally finished my formal job training, General Conference, my cousin got married, Scissor came to visit, a trip to Cornbelly's with some chill folks, Boyfriend's birthday, punkin' carving, watching Hocus Pocus, pretty foliage, carmel apples and carmel popcorn?! With all of these elements combined its all I can do to keep myself from going to the craft store for mutant, Yeti squash and shellacked vegetables and arranging that shiz in a horn-shaped wicker basket. It's what the pilgrims would want, I feel, to commemorate this time of year. 

Aaron & Ashley's reception. In the face!!!

Happy 24th, Spouse! Kinda blurry, but its the only evidence I have of the evening.

So the creepy lady in the red? We tried probably a billion times to take a picture without her in the background, after a billion it just seemed funny that she refused us our couple's picture.

We are extremely photogenic while waiting for the Pig Races.

Scissor, myself and Mallory right before the Corn Maze.

A decent picture of us on the "Bridge of Victory" leaving the maze. Boyfriend is so hot.

Then we ALL got out faces painted. Those people made a killing on all  8 of us. It was so nice to feel like a teenager again for a night.  (Thanks, Ash for the photobomb.)

 

A personal fave. JJ is a baller in Pandaface, while Caleb got a Mike Tyson tattoo that mutated into a  HelloKitty thing?? The folks at Burger King had a few odd looks and questions for us.

And finally, lettuce not forget that my life is a series of awkward events. This week's highlight? Farting in public accidentally on purpose. Yeah, I said it. Wat ha happen wuz, we went to the movies. Since I have an infant-sized bladder and we bought a 246 oz drink, I had to pee halfway through the movie-- Shocking! So I find the bathroom, handle my business and wash my hands. There are no paper towels, so I use the automatic hand dryer. All the carbonation has made me gassy at this point, so I let one rip. Well...mid-release the air cuts off and I'm still expelling my gases. And it was pretty loud. I would have been impressed with myself if some lady in a stall hadn't started laughing out loud at me. It was then I decided the right plan of action was to RUN out of the bathroom before said woman came out of her stall and we made awkward eye contact. Or maybe it would have been hilarious. I didn't want to wait and find out. 

See? Your life isn't that bad. 

Happy November! Only 19 more days until Thanksgiving. I'm so excited/nervous I've scheduled an appointment on my iPhone to piss myself. (I'm excited because I love to eat and nervous because I've volunteered to do a Thanksgiving dinner for 10+ by myself this year. Prayers and positive vibes would be appreciated.)